Knkstriped

#Pervember 6: Sensory Deprivation

There is so much to enjoy about sensory deprivation. For myself, as a submissive; the element of handing over control to someone else and making myself vulnerable, is all kinds of delicious.

It was with great enthusiasm then, that I participated in the sensory deprivation workshop at Kinkfest, earlier this year which was led by the wise and experienced Phoenix Flight. The Mr was willing and eager, (although I suspect he was only half-joking when he let out a sigh of relief and declared “this is why I really came along” after fastening a gag firmly in place around my head)

Love, Sex, Kink – a Venn diagram

Venn diagram of love, sex and kink

See that sweet spot right there in the middle? I never used to believe it existed. It’s such a small, low-probability intersection, considering my limited capacity to differentiate between romantic love and naive infatuation. I stopped believing in ‘happy ever after’ a long time ago. I don’t miss my illusions. They got me into all sorts of trouble.

Mindfucking

I dislike the term ‘foreplay’ with its insinuation that penetration is the main event; and as though anything non-penetrative is trivial and frivolous compared to the Real Business of sticking something somewhere.

But even if I were to use that term as shorthand for ‘the introductory stages of sexual activity for the purpose of stimulating arousal’, I’d still have issues with the ‘play’ part. I like my getting-revved-up activity to be serious. Not necessarily solemn, but with focus, intent and dedication. No messing about here, I want to see hunger and need in your eyes. That turns me on, more than any caress.